Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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