Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Randomize