just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
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