Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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