The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
