once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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