508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
