Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
