can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
