A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
