this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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