I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize