this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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