OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I'm really busy with my period
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