I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
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