By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Terrible idea I love it
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
