this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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