For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
