i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
