Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize
