ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
