Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
