You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
how do flat chested girls get laid?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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