The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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