Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
