Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
