it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.