And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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