Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
