Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
