So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
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