Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
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My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
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you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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