Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
