Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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