So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
nutella sex= disaster
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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