Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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