He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
