If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
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