you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Randomize
