got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
