i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
