Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
