actually, I'm a sock model
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
