Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
