Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
