So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
