Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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