Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
