haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
