i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
There are leaves in my underwear?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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