Don't make out with my wife yet
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?